I remember when I was younger, one of the things that I craved the most was the approval from my family and friends, sometimes I would do things I did not believe in just to fit in.
As an adult, sometimes those habits can crip in and show up now and then, one day I picked a book called The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck by Mark Manson, and this book completely changed how I think.
In this post, I will share how to stop caring about what others think and start living your life on your terms.
How to Stop Caring About What Others Think
Learning how to stop caring about what others think is key to personal freedom, happiness, and self-empowerment.
Here’s how you can take steps to liberate yourself from the weight of other people’s opinions.
Understand That People Are Focused on Themselves
One of the biggest realizations that can help you stop caring about others’ opinions is this: most people are too busy thinking about themselves.
You might think that everyone is paying attention to your actions or appearance, but in reality, they’re caught up in their worries and insecurities. When you recognize this, it becomes easier to let go of the fear of judgment.
What to do?
Next time you feel self-conscious, remind yourself that people are likely not focused on you. They are probably worrying about their concerns.
Set Your Values and Goals
When you live according to your values and goals, the opinions of others become less important.
What do you believe in? What makes you happy? If you have clear values and personal goals, they will guide your decisions rather than the fear of disapproval.
How to set your goals and values
Write down your core values and long-term goals.
Use these as a compass to make decisions, instead of worrying about how others might perceive you.
Ask yourself: “Am I doing this for myself or someone else’s approval?”
Accept Yourself
If you are a people pleaser, you will always feel like you are not enough, or you are not as cool as your friends or people around you.
The more you accept yourself, the less you’ll rely on external validation. Embrace your flaws, strengths, and everything in between.
The truth is, no one is perfect, and pretending to be someone you’re not just to impress others will lead to dissatisfaction.
Ways to Practice Self-Acceptance
Positive affirmations: Each morning, say something kind to yourself. Example: “I am enough just as I am.”
Forgive yourself: Don’t be too hard on yourself for past mistakes. Everyone makes them, and they are part of growth.
Limit Social Media Consumption
One of the things I did to get out of this way of thinking is removing Facebook from my phone apps, you see, most people I know and went to school with are on Facebook, and everyone was posting their fake life and I used to feel like I was far behind in life.
Social media is a major source of comparison and judgment. When you spend too much time scrolling through other people’s curated lives, you can easily fall into the trap of worrying about how you measure up.
Reducing your time on social media helps you focus on your own life and your reality, rather than comparing it to the highlight reels of others.
How to use social media to your advantage
Set limits on your social media usage.
For example, try staying off social platforms for an hour or two each day to reconnect with your real-world priorities.
Follow accounts that promote positivity and self-acceptance, and unfollow those that make you feel inadequate.
Develop a Strong Sense of Purpose
Having a sense of purpose helps you stay focused on what truly matters. When you are passionate about your goals or your mission, the opinions of others start to matter less.
Purpose gives your life meaning, and it can make you more resilient to outside judgment.
For me it started when I started getting fit and started building my online business.
How to develop a sense of purpose
Think about what makes you excited to get out of bed in the morning. What kind of work or activities bring you fulfillment? When you focus on these, the opinions of others become less significant.
Ask yourself: “What impact do I want to have on the world?” This could guide you toward actions that align with your purpose, rather than seeking approval.
Surround Yourself with Supportive People
The company you keep can influence how much you care about others’ opinions. If you’re constantly surrounded by judgmental or critical people, it’s natural to feel the weight of their views.
However, when you’re surrounded by positive, supportive individuals who encourage you to be yourself, it’s much easier to let go of that pressure.
How to build a supportive cycle
Prioritize spending time with friends or family who respect you for who you are, rather than those who try to mold you into someone else.
Consider distancing yourself from relationships that make you feel insecure or judged.
Practice Mindfulness and Be Present
Mindfulness can help you stay grounded in the present moment, reducing the power of negative thoughts.
By focusing on the here and now, you can stop your mind from wandering into the realm of “What will people think?”
Mindfulness teaches you to accept your thoughts and feelings without judgment, allowing you to release them.
How to be more mindful
Start with simple breathing exercises or meditation. When you catch yourself worrying about others’ opinions, take a few deep breaths and bring your focus back to the present.
Practice being fully engaged in your daily activities, whether it’s eating, walking, or talking with a friend. The more you practice mindfulness, the less time you’ll spend worrying about judgment.
Challenge Your Inner Critic
Often, the harshest critic is the one inside your head. Your inner critic might make you doubt yourself and feed into the fear of judgment from others.
Learning to challenge and quiet that critical voice can help you stop caring about what others think.
How to Silence Your Inner Critic
Identify negative self-talk
When you catch yourself thinking negatively about how others perceive you, pause and question whether those thoughts are rational or based on fear. •
Replace negative thoughts with positive ones
For every self-critical thought, challenge it with a positive affirmation. For example, if you think, “They probably think I’m awkward,” replace it with “I am confident and worthy.”
Take Small Steps Toward Authenticity
It’s okay to start small when learning how to care less about others’ opinions. You don’t need to make drastic changes overnight.
Start by practicing authenticity in smaller areas of your life, like speaking your mind in casual conversations or dressing in a way that reflects your true self.
As you grow more comfortable with being yourself, you’ll gain the confidence to let go of others’ opinions in bigger ways.
How to get started
Try saying “no” to something small that doesn’t align with your values or interests.
Express your opinion in a conversation, even if you’re unsure how others will respond.
Key Takeaways: How to Stop Caring About What Others Think
Letting go of what others think is a process that requires patience, self-reflection, and practice.
The more you focus on understanding your values, embracing your uniqueness, and surrounding yourself with positivity, the less power others’ opinions will have over your life.
Remember, the most important opinion is your own. By taking small, intentional steps, you can start living authentically and create a life that feels true to who you are.
You are in control of your happiness—don’t let the judgment of others dictate your path.